Where am i?

Sometimes i feel lost. Lost in my own world. Lost in my own feeling. Lost in my own dream.


Lost in my own smoke!!

Donno why am i lost in that area and places. Maybe the way i conduct my own life. Do i conduct myself in a better way? Too much question in my mind and i could not answer all those question by myself but there is nobody who can answer that with me.

Really missing my last time in school, college and work. And i really miss my buddy (*heartbeat* do u know that i miss u so much).



If i have the time machine i will go to my last time story to make it fresh in my mind, to change something that i do regret a lot and to remind myself to do the best and make sure that now i feel better with myslef.

Ok la.. let me think over again about me and will write something later..

Footnote: Buddy 1 do missing buddy 2

Hati.. Bagaimana Cara MenenangkanMu!!

Dah lama tak jot down something here. Busy with work.. work... work.. work! Hadirlagi cerita aku disini malam ini kerana hati aku sangat sakit.. sangat geram... mengapa dia yang bergelar lelaki tidak pernah pandai untuk menjaga secubit cuma hati seorang gadis. Susah ker nak jaga hati perempuan. Aku tak cerewet macam sesetengah perempuan. Aku tak pernah meminta, aku tak memaksa cuma apa yang aku ingin ialah sedikit pengertian untuk memasukkan aku dalam satu agenda seharian dia. Susah ker? Kalau dia ada 10 agenda aku hanya ingin berada dalam satu agenda sahaja... bukan semua agenda... susah lagi ker?



Penat sudah rasanya aku mencuba untuk melembutkan hatinya yang beku? Bibir dan perilaku menunjukkan penerimaan nya tapi cara bertindak tidak melambangkan penerimaan. Dah ku cuba lakukan yang terbaik. Tapi tak nampak penghargaan... tak nampak kemajuan... Kenapa dingin sangat hatimu sayang!? AKu tahu kau menerima tapi kau cukup bodoh dalam memperlihatkan penerimaan dengan perlakuan.



Benar kata orang.. disebalik keindahan cinta tersembunyi duri yang menyakitkan. Tapi kenapa keindahan perlu bersulam kan kesakitan. Tidak bolehkan smua keindahan disulamkan dengan kebahagiaan. Kini aku masih mencuba untuk menumpulkan semua duri yang tajam dengan sabar tapi semuanya terlalu perlahan. Kudratku sudah hampir kepenghujung tapi aku masih cuba untuk gagahi nya dengan saki baki kekuatan yang ada. Entah bagaimana akhirnya??

AKU CUMA INGIN BAHAGIA!!

Happy tapi Depress + Tension Secubit Bahagia

Its been a veru long period when i stop writing here in my page. Berhenti kerana ... i dont know. Just cant blame the situation i am having now and before but just busy maybe....

Now at the moment i have been closed to a guy who works as a chef... not chef in the hotel... just at a small restaurant but it seems okay to me. And at the moment i feel bahagia since dia treat me good. Nice of him and do love him so much....

wHat'S Is HapPEnIng!?? HerE In My StuPid DaMn Life!?

Today me stuck with my own situation. Not feeling so good and not feeling so well.. And become hatered with myself. Why and how me keep stuck with the same things same condition where i promise not to stuck in it ever and ever again...

I have a friend yang frustrated with his love life and decided to not getting married and stay alone forever. Sometimes i wonder how is he going to get through his life without pasangan dia.. Pelikkan.. Even he told me that one day he will travel and only come back when his life is over 50++..

Getting bored day by day!!

When The Heart Is Tired and Feel Hopeless!!

Tired and hopeless...

Tired. letih. penat, yer hati kita seringkali penat dan letih bila menerima dugaan yang sesama berulang kali. Dan bila hati menjadi penat dan letih.. hati tiada semangat dan bila semangat hilang ia akan jadi hopeless...
Bukan hopeless in my career.. because i love my job so much right now. But i was tired and become hopeless in having a new love relation... I still have my trust in love but i have tired of being frustrated. Now stop searching for it and just wait for it come for me... Its that easy.

no TiTle

yersterday was to learn and tomorrow will be the consequence of what i can do today. Today is the last opportunity i have to live intensely, as no one can assure me that i will see tomorrow's sunrise. Today i will be brave enough not to let any opportunity pass me by, my only alternative is to succeed. Today i will invest my most valuable resource, my time in the most transcendental work, my life, i will spend each minute passionately to make of today a different and unique day in my life. Today i will resist pessimism and will conquer the world with a smile, with the positive attittude of expecting always the best.

today i will make of every ordinary task as subline expression. Today i will have my feet on the ground understanding reality and the stars gaze to invent my future. Today i will take the time to be happy and will leave my footprints and my presence in th hearts of others. Today i invote you to begin a new season where we can dream that everything we undertake is possible and we fulfill it with joy and dignity....

Semenjak dua menjak ni aku tak tahu kenapa kadang2 aku jadi sayu. Hati dan perasaan jadi saya tanpa reason yang munasabah. Macam dah takder benda lagi yang boleh buat aku happy macam dulu. Kadang aku pujuk diri sendiri. Dan selalu bertanya dengan diri kenapa aku menangis tapi jawapan tetap tidak aku jumpa. Betul2 buntu..

Mungkin kerana kesunyian... Mungkin kerana dah bosan dengan perjalanan hidup aku yang tak pernah lalui jalan yang lurus... Ada jer dugaan dan halangan yang ada.